Like Shattered Glass.

We all experience the déjà vu of recurring dreams… but what about the horror of recurring nightmares? For the last few years, I have struggled to wake up.  Welcome to my recurring nightmare.  In this show of horrors, I’m screaming, shouting at the top of my sore lungs, but nothing comes out.  I fight to … Continue reading

Inside the glass jar.

I’ve always loved fireflies.  The glitter of their sparkle, the freedom of their flight, fireflies amazed me.  As a child, my sister and I would catch them in glass jars to watch their beautiful bulbs glow in the silky darkness.  Now, at 24, however, I commiserate with the light bulbs of the night.  They were … Continue reading

Free falling.

Lately I’ve been tired.  My eyes don’t just have bags under them; they have the entire line of the 2011 Louis Vuitton resort luggage collection stacked beneath them.  I’ve been catching up on sleep and trying to incorporate healthier foods into my daily diet, so why I am so tired, you ask? I think too … Continue reading

I’m bringing [Jordan] back…

Sometimes I wonder: Will anyone ever understand me the way my ex did?  OK, I can already pinpoint this thought as a distorted cognition caused by the cognitive dissonance I feel as a survivor of abuse, but bear with me on my disillusioned trip to La La Land. Fact: I was only 16 when I … Continue reading

Silencing my ‘Monkey Mind’

Mother Nature’s bipolar disorder has put a damper on my plans as of late. Cleveland’s weather went from temperatures in the low 80s to a balmy 99 degrees and climbing.  Add a little precipitation and what you have is the perfect climate for poufy, frizzy hair.  The 1980s called, they want their look back—and they can … Continue reading

Like a Skyscraper

You can take everything I have You can break everything I am Like I’m made of glass Like I’m made of paper Go on a try to tear me down I will be rising from the ground Like a skyscraper

Birthday Girl of 24

Well blogging friends, tomorrow is my 24th birthday, so maybe it’s time to change the title of my blog to “Saving my life at 24.”  But maybe not.  23 was a significant year for me.  Instead of wishing for a new bag or sexy stilettos, I blew my candles out last year wishing for salvation.  … Continue reading

My Sunday Prayer

   “People don’t change–only their costumes do.” — Gene Moore     Serenity Prayer for Pathological Relationships Lord, help me to accept the pathology and the things in him and this relationship that I cannot change To change the things I can in my own life that will help me leave, heal, and recover since … Continue reading

“Fear–So What?”

“Courage allows the successful woman to fail and learn powerful lessons— from the failure—so that in the end, she didn’t fail at all.”—Maya Angelou               When I was fifteen I was completely enamored with a particular book series.  In the lazy, warm days of summer, I would peacefully sway outside on a hammock while … Continue reading

Maybe you just need to take a leap of Faith

“Faith is walking face-first and full-speed into the dark. If we truly knew all the answers in advance as to the meaning of life and the nature of God and the destiny of our souls, our belief would not be a leap of faith and it would not be a courageous act of humanity; it … Continue reading